Why Did I Leave my Kids?

I've just finished watching Come Home on BBC iPlayer and WOW, it really triggered me, I mean REALLY triggered me! Days of processing and crying followed. 

13 years ago I left my husband and my 3 kids just like the mum in the show had (although mine came to stay with me half the week) and so watching the show I was propelled back to that time but now I was viewing it with full clarity. 

Read More
How can I rebel AND live a virtuous life? 

Please tell me that I’m not the only rebel struggling to rebel in a time when virtuous living is EVERYTHING? 

When I say I’m a rebel, I mean a REBEL. 

I started smoking at 10 years old, I started bunking soon after (you can’t smoke on the school grounds), I smoked weed at 13, got pissed on vodka on a school night out at the Ritzy, Tottenham at 14. I dropped out of school at 15 (yep not one GCSE, fucking wild) and I was dancing in bars for money in Tenerife at the ripe age of 16.

Read More
Oh, F**k Off Wonder Woman

My day started with the realisation that Ace’s whole school uniform and PE Kit were still in the washing machine wet from the wash last night. 

It had been my intention to hang it all out last night before going to bed (we don’t have a tumble dryer) but due to being so overworked (and yes underpaid) I fell asleep at 8pm and missed the end of the cycle. 

While I’m sat here naively imagining the clothes being dry in half an hour on the radiators I’m feeling defeated and fed up. 

Read More
Are Women Feeding the Patriarchy?

I was having a chat with a friend the other day; we were discussing the difference between being a mum of boys vs being a mum of girls.

I was explaining how I felt my relationship with my grown sons was far more fragile than that of my almost grown up daughter and what impact that made on them as adults.

We started to dig deeper, why did I feel so different about being a mum to boys than being a mum to a girl? (aside from the obvs, tissues under the bed vs hunting out my eyeliner AGAIN from the pit of despair she calls her bedroom).

Read More
I Give Zero Fu*ks About Swears

Ok, so I swear, I swear……a lot!

I like to swear, it feels rebellious, it feels controversial, it feels somehow, freeing and it’s become a bit like my trade mark, this has been proven 3 times, twice when I went on BBC Essex and once when I spoke at a WI meeting, both occasions started with ‘Welcome Lauren, please don’t swear’.  Much to mine and other peoples surprise I did actually manage to hold them all in as requested (at least we now know it’s not Tourette’s!).

One of the mums from Ace’s (5) school recently asked me after seeing me swearing like a docker at my book launch where Ace was present, if it worries me that Ace hears me swearing?

Read More